First Post

So I've had this blog set up for a long time but never had gotten around to writing a post. Part of it is that I can't believe that I would have anything interesting to say. After all I'm no theologian or academic. I'm an Accountant. My job although somewhat fulfilling for me is not very interesting for anyone else (Trust me I've gotten those looks when I tell people what I do). My friends in Durango have started blogging in the last couple of years. I love reading their posts. I love having a glimpse into their lives. At the same time I'm sure it helps sort of try to make sense from life when you are thinking about how to share it with others. I'm hoping that it will help me do that.

I'm in sort of an odd place in my life. Sort of at a crossroads that I'm trying to navigate.

I spent the last five years of my life working for a CPA firm as an auditor. In that time I got married and settled into a life with my husband, Jesse. I loved it, mostly. I got to go all over the city and work with a bunch of people within about 10 years of me in age (on either side). Most everyone was smart and nice and we all cared about our clients and doing the best we could for them. It was like college all over again but I was making good money and learning real world stuff. I also made very close friends while I was there.

About two years ago I started to realize that I was not living as happy a life as I probably could have been. There so many weekends and nights that I spent working. Because everyone around me was doing this I thought I should too. My relationship with husband and my family was suffering though. I can remember so many times of putting my job first that I'm ashamed to have been that person. Telling my husband we'd hang out "later" (whenever that was...) and telling my aging parents that I was too busy to see them just makes my heart break.

I also started to notice that my health was suffering. One thing I learned while I was auditing is that I really love food! Between eating out all the time for lunch and not having time to go grocery shopping to take care of myself I gained about 50 lbs from the time that I started at the firm until I left. 50 lbs!! That's like a child! I also never slept or did things for me. I was starting to get sick.

I also was getting to realize that I was never going to be the best again. I was a great staff! (CPA firm is structured so you're a staff first, then a senior, then a manager, then a senior manager and then a partner). I worked hard, I anticipated what people around me would need and I followed directions. I also learned a ton. A ton about people, about how to ask questions and alot about Accounting. When I became a senior things fell apart for me a little bit. I wasn't good at my job anymore. Then a bunch of family stuff happened and I really wasn't a good senior (I'm sure I'll talk about it in future posts). I was tired of only being adequate, not great. After working late into the night for several nights and have a manager basically tell me I wasn't doing enough, I gave up. I spent the next several months finding another job.
I found a job with a small privately owned company as a senior accountant and started in June. It seemed like it was going to be exactly what I wanted. A place to continue working within accounting and grow my skills to eventually move to a higher level accounting position, while at the same time being able to maintain a family/home life. So far things have been good. I've learned a fair amount about how the accounting system works here and I've been home a lot more. Even during the year end stuff I was able to work any over time (which was minimal) from home. It's been great. I'm getting along well with my husband and I've even lost a little weight (according to the Dr.). We also got a puppy and I've been working on settling into the house we bought this summer. Life sounds great doesn't it?
I find myself missing how busy I was. It's like I'm waiting for something else to come along. I thought for a while that I was just ready to have kids but I'm not sure that's it. I'm searching and waiting but in the mean time I'm figuring out my new life. Life is very different and perhaps it will take some time to get used to. Anyway that's my first post...probably a good starting off point to talk about where I'm at now.