I've been married almost 5 years (will be on Sept 25, 2009). From the day we got married there has been some expectation that at some point we were going to have children. I spent a lot of time and energy furthering my knowledge and carreer the last few years including getting my CPA license. I've also watched more than a few of my friends have children (most of them multiple children!). I'm going to be 29 in about 2 months. We bought a house this last year and I finally changed jobs to a career that would allow me to spend more time at home. My biological clock is finally starting to tick.......LOUD! I keep having dreams babies, holding babies, being on maternity leave, etc. The thing is although things are more right than they were a year ago I don't think we're quite there yet. Jesse just started back to school and we have a fair amount of debt to pay back.
Got any ideas about how to make the clock tick a little quieter for now?? I'm not quite sure how. I keep having deep thoughts like.....what am I doing? How will I touch eternity? Is reconciling the books going to be enough for me to be happy in life? How do you really know you're really know you're ready to be in charge of another human being? I'm not sure yet. All I know is that I need to figure some stuff out and take my time.
2 comments:
Oh lady - I love how much you think! It cracks me up! Just know, you will never have all the answers to the questions. Because, when you answer the ones you have now, others will come up. And when you answer those, others. It's a part of life, of growing. And, if you wait until you have no more debt, you'll find another reason.
I think God gives us those biological clocks to help us give up our ideas of the perfect time. Because it won't stop ticking now that it's started. And it won't get any quieter, believe me! You simply have to say, "Ok God, I trust your timing more than mine." I love you!
I love this post. I must be honest with you however, the timing will never be perfect. I can guarantee that you will always have things going on in your life. It's just the way it is. I totally agree with Tiffany.
What you have to figure out is if you're "ready". Ready to love something so much you can't stand it (in a totally different way then your hubby), ready to see how impatient and selfish you really are :), and ready to have a blast seeing God's creation and being a part of His miracle. It's amazing, scary, hard and awesome.
Can't wait to see how this all turns out. Excited for you guys!
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